on 3 things you should try

alright, so dont get too excited about this post, pretty sure i went a little overboard the last few times and im putting my couch-induced Socrates episodes on hold for a bit. really all i wanted to do today was to do absolutely nothing, and i succeeded. flying colors. could have starred in office space today. rather i watched inglorious basterds, (phe-nominal) and had some serious dude time with my dad.
but the reason i felt compelled to throw another one of these out there today is that i had a couple of recommendations that are simply awesome. thats all. no big life changers or wild ragers or park rangers or immanent dangers or airplane hangers or rhyming lessons. the last one might be a lie, fly guy. god im an idiot.
ok, recommendations. these are things that ive found in my quest for awesome to be, well, just that, awesome. ill get into detail later, but take these, read em, give it a thought, call me a dumbass and continue your day.

NUMBER 1: Go to a hockey game
alright, this one is simple, the other two are a little out there, but this one's beauty is in is simplicity. hockey is badass, first of all. and the game is REALLY easy to understand. only 2 speed bumps, offsides and icing, once you have those down the rest is groovy. EASY. connect 4, i swear. alright im not completely clueless, i realize guys who read this like Nasty, BR, Taco, Big Country and the Ville are sports fans who combined could probably produce an episode of Sportscenter, but this is mostly for anyone who either 1. has not been, or 2. in fact qualifies as a girl. a third option, if you are so fortunate and exponentially cooler that i am, is a date. its constant action, hard hitting, and pretty darn saucy live and in person. on the flipside, baseball a great game, but high risk in this situation. its long, slow, and when the guy is admiring the greatest of pitching duals, the girl is wondering if text messages are cool to break up by. add that to possible sun burn and the obese superfan flinging his nachos and falling over your date to grab the beachball (thanks dodgerblues.com) and you could spell disaster if you arent careful, and lucky enough to spell. football is confusing, straight up. i really have got nothing on basketball except that the clippers are sad, you go to watch the other team, and my left arm for a laker game is considerable, but i look long term. hockey is unique, and you could possibly create a new fan, just dont forget to give her your sweater.

LETTER B: Meditation
so i stumbled upon this one from Mrs. Hawthorne, my mother, a saint. she's into some pretty cool stuff, stars, the Dalai Lama, cooking, theater, and is a dead eye at the shooting range. stud. she was watching her programs one evening, i got sucked in despite my best efforts, and this is the result. meditiation. we already know about my Yes Man tendencies, but nobody even had to ask me for this, i was just down. the Lama and friends were just so stoked on everything it seemed. as i watched these scientists try to figure out how these little asian dudes could get to be twice as awesome as them, i decided to proclaim my room that night to be meditation station. i did the research, and here's how to do it like an all-star: http://www.how-to-meditate.org/. all you need are the Breathing Meditation and Meditation Posture links on the left and youre cash. i got in the zone after like 30 something breaths and literally went places, and felt like a hundred bucks after. give it a shot, make up your mind, and let me know.

NUMBER 3: Shakespeare
i can hear the collective sighs, groans and laptops closing at the very mention of that guy, but you've got to read shakespeare. now i know that a lot of people say, "i dont get it. sorry i dont speak jive or whatever the hell that is" but not even kidding, he's the most intuitive author to grace god's green earth. the guy knows more about people's minds than mr. t knows about pitying fools, and any situation you've even been in your entire life HE'S WRITTEN ABOUT. love, hate, reputation, backstabbing, betrayal, power, subversion, parents, children, death, war, life, strife and booze this guy's forgotten more about all of them than you'll ever know. think about that last comment, pure fact. now here's the rub (bonus: that's shakespeare quote by the way, and when you start throwing those out routinely in daily interaction, ladies will want to be with you and guys will want to be you), its flippin maddening to understand. you'll have to work at it, but its literature, and every little hidden gem of genious is whatever you make it! its as much yours as old William's. your guess as to what many things mean is as good as any nerd Stanford professor's. read deep, this is the hardest recommendation by far i know, but possibly the most rewarding. granted i had an incredible high school teacher who helped me understand this guy like no other, but if you give it a try you'll pretty much be able to read minds (or as zoolander so eloquently put, you'll become bulimic).

if you give any a try, please let me know how it goes so i'll have proof that i should just shut my mouth and never recommend so much as a snickers bar to anyone. in closing, keep reading, let me know if you like this thing, and live awesome party animals.

on being a Yes Man

id like to apologize, ive been m.i.a. on this the past week and a half and being in full ghost mode is becoming a scary routine for me. so here we go...

first.

side note: currently watching an episode of House with a scene filmed on honolulu ave. right by my house, pretty much exactly where will ferrell went streaking in old school and up the street where vincent chase of entourage bought his first motorcycle, i love bragging about that, im so tight.

song of the week: You Might Die Trying by Dave Matthews Band. find on playlist.com, press play and continue.


alright, so ive always been somewhat of a yes man, but on new years eve the br3r squad watched the movie, i got inspired, and decided to give it a real shot.
hey mason, you wanna stay up all night? yup
hey mase, up for some bananagrams? down
masos, want to drive Nasty to 24 hour fitness and work out at 6AM on no sleep? yessir
wanna swing by the rose parade? yeya
should we go by the Rose Bowl and see whos tailgating? word
we charm the pants off of the tired girl working at 24hour fitness at 6 AM and she lets me through without a membership, buckets. Nasty kicks my ass in a workout while i curse at his ab routine, but i make it out alive. we leave for the rose bowl tailgate and its a zoo. I pull up to the $30 parking zone and of course run into some guy that Nasty's known forevers. he tells us to drive on through and have a blast, free of charge. Nasty cant get a hold of BrotherMan who we knew would be in rare form (hammered) at that point (8 AM) at the massive tailgate, so we decide to let the parking attendants decide our fate. turns out, they lead us to no fun and we call it a sleepless night/new years morning.

now i know what youre thinking. thats the best i can do for a yes man on new years? not very impressive. come on mase dawg, figure it out. so as i sit here trying to come up with something ive learned about my new years, all i can come up with is that kill bill 1 and 2 are badass and that i need to get more sleep.

so i think, and i think, and think. and im getting bad at this, the Sunday Driver has found its demise after 3 posts and i fizzle out like my tampa bay bucs in the 4th quarter. so i decide to sit back and let this episode of House unfold... let it happen...

all the sudden, (i swear it was like the moment house gets that epiphany: the blank stare, the quickly bursting into the patient's life threatening surgery to give the real diagnosis, the patient needs orange juice or some simple shit) i realize that the point of this story does not lie in what i did on new years, but it really goes back to that little side note i barely decided to throw in at the beginning. im 3 posts into this blog thing, and all of the sudden, im forcing it. i watch as this dying dude on the television takes a gun and holds House and other people hostage in order to get a diagnosis he's never been able to get for 10 years. he obviously is having a terrible life right now, so he decided to take a gun, and force it. on the contrary, i remember Jim Carrey in yes man as the perfect embodiment of the opposite. he decides to let things happen and has a great life, clearly NOT forcing it. so i looked at my new years, and i figured out why i havent had one of those bomb ass moments that ive got to share with the world in a while. i came to the conclusion that, now see if you can follow this, i was forcing NOT forcing it. i tried too hard to not try too hard. hah

if i were reading this i would ask myself, "wow, are you serious guy? lets get this straight, your whining because your trying too hard to have something exciting happen to you? you're a dumbass, theres starving kids in africa you selfish idiot."
but think about it, you can fall into a rut or just for some reason feel the need for a change, and we've all felt it at one point or another, and with all consideration to starvin marvin and everyone with real problems, sometimes people just arent happy with whats going on. but trust me, think about what you've got going for you, and dont force it. you'll feel like a hundred bucks soon enough.
now i usually dont get this deep but as you can see from me letting the movie yes man guide an entire 24 hour span of my life, im a little impressionable, and this house episode brought it all out.
funny how it works but i know that its clearly and no doubt the truth, mainly because i get this relieved feeling every time i finish one of these knowing i learned something dope, and maybe someone else did too.

so the point is, dont force it, make stuff happen at life's pace, not your own, and youll have some fun. the guy in the house episode finally stopped forcing it, house got the diagnosis, and the man took the first deep breath he's been able to take in 10 years. and remember, if you do force it, You Might Die Trying (dave matthews). wow that tied in just beautifully, swear to god unplanned. if its meant to happen, it'll happen.